New Year 2006

Ok, party people, it was New Year's Rockin' Eve. Dick's dropping his ball in Times Square and we're all invited to watch. I know what I said in my last entry, but New Year's was a bit less low-key. The big midnight moment inspires me to put a little more effort in. I got gussied up in some finery, got my hair did, and prepared to whoop it up. I showed up at a party at the Neighbors' abode where Neighbor J and B had put out a spread complete with a retro relish tray and a gigantic jug of Canadian Club whiskey donated to the party by the elderly couple across the street, who apparently think us young hipsters roll like Deano, Sammy, and Blue Eyes.

In a party of folks who range from closer-than-family to never-met-you-before and everywhere in between, a funny thing happens at the stroke of midnight. As we count down the seconds, the power of New Year's tradition unites us all in anticipation. We all know what to do-- we count and wait for the fireworks display outside of the Neighbors' window as we stand in the dimmed room. When we get to "Zero!" we all yell "Happy New Year!" and those of us with some arm-candy get a smooch to bring in the year. As soon as that moment is over, the unison of action breaks apart and we all start stumbling around like the Borg after Picard and Data kill the Queen. Admit it- you don't know the protocol here. Do you give a warm, unselfconsious hug to the dude you just met tonight that happens to be standing next to you? Do you stick your hand out for the handshake (a favorite amongst the boys) only to be met with open arms a la Steve Perry? Do you stand awkwardly and try to not make eye contact with those that you find unhuggable? Do you go for the platonic kiss on the cheek and risk missing and landing your liplock on someone's ear? It's like the end of a first date with an entire party full of people.

Here's what I say. Lube up your tonsils with some Canadian Club and pucker up your chops. Spread it around like Peter Lawford at the Sands. It's New Year's. Ring a ding ding.

Kiss the rings, I'm out.
Librarian Girl