The Comfy Chair!

I just got back from a trip to California with a monster cold, so my head feels cloudy like I'm Sissy Spacek mixed with Kevin Spacey, working at Spacely Sprockets. I've spent the day away from Libraryland soothing my head with tv, tea, and tissues. I usually get kind of pissy when I'm sick, but my weekend was so fun that I am feeling ok about not feeling ok.

My trip started with an upgrade to first class on the plane. Now I know I've thus far tried to maintain some semblance of classiness on this blog, but I admit I have never flown first class. I'm a librarian, not Mia Thermopolis. It was so interesting. For those of you that haven't had your first-class cherry popped (there's that classiness again), I'll tell you about it. It's not just about the comfy chair. There's so much more to it than that. As you probably already know, you get to board before everyone else. This helps you feel sexily arrogant like Steff in Pretty in Pink. When you get on, there's a dude in a black turtleneck who takes your bags and hangs up your coat, which is kind of nice, but he does it in such a pursed-lips way that you feel like you should challenge him to a snooty contest. A snoot off. Before the flight starts, another flight attendant comes along and asks you BY NAME what your drink order is. So instead of the rolling cart thingy, she has a pad of paper and takes your order. Aren't I like Robin Leach telling you all this? Aren't you so impressed with it? Then, (drumroll please), you get TWO packages of trail mix. That's right, I said two. You don't even have to ask. When I was handed my ration, I almost started to give one of my packages back, thinking it was a mistake. How gauche. Along with this comes your beverage, which is served to you in an actual glass. As in made out of glass. That extra money is looking so worth it now, isn't it? Oh, I was making clinky-clink sounds with my ice and everything. Then, after the trail mix course, you get to the main event. Hot nuts. Don't you just love that? I was loving it, and not because it sounds dirty. Ok, not entirely because of that. You get a cup of mixed nuts that have been heated up to simulate the roasting process. So there you are, nibbling the hot nuts and sipping out of your glass glass. The riff raff in the back doesn't have any idea what they're missing.

This was how I spent the two hours as I went back to Cali. On the way home I had to return to coach, feverish, sick and squished into the small seats. Lost my privilege like Dudley Moore in Arthur Two. Back to the world where cups are plastic and nuts are cold.

Kiss the rings, I'm out.
Librarian Girl