Consumables #22

Reel Paradise

I was not a big fan of this. It's been sitting on my Netflix queue forever and I just kept putting off watching it because I knew it would piss me off. I shall spare you my thoughts on cultural imperialism and just say (and you may quote me on this): BARF.

The Bachelorette
Just when I thought I was out, THEY PULLED ME BACK IN. I haven't watched all season, but I did watch the last two episodes and I can't even believe how mind-numbingly boring these people are. Why do I want to watch boring people vying for each other's boring affection? I'll tell you why. It's because they go on "overnight dates" and use funny euphemisms for making the sex. "I am just really looking forward to having alone time with Ali. So that we can really relax. And just get to know each other more deeply." "I really want Chris to put himself out there tonight. I just really need to see who he is." What is it with the "putting himself out there," people? So many times with the "putting himself out there"! Apparently, it is the main thing one looks for in a mate. Perhaps we should be incorporating this into our vows to each other. "Do you promise to always love, honor, and put yourself out there?"

Zookeeper's Wife by Diane Ackerman
I am not usually impressed by celebrity. Large or small. Hot movie star, or brainiest professor on campus? Whatever. If you are the person that everyone talks about and oohs and ahhs over, this will most likely cause me to be skeptical of you. When I was in the THEE-AH-TAH!, the big stars that came in that everyone went googoo for? They were straight up assholes. Like, 99% of the time. So although I don't think celebrity/popularity makes you an ass, I do think the liklihood is higher. So in the library world, the biggest celebrity is a little lady by the name of Nancy Pearl. If you have ever seen the Librarian Action Figure, it is based on her. Also, you may hear her on NPR's Morning Edition or other egghead places like that, reviewing books and talking about other librarianish things. To the non-librarian, she is pretty unknown. To the librarian, she is more beloved than Shel fucking Silverstein. When she shows up to conferences and stuff, people go all atwitter. Therefore, my natural inclination toward her should be one of gaggy eye-rolling. However, in this case, I must make an exception to my skepticism. Because Nancy is the nicest lady you will ever meet in your life. Really, she is. Anyway, I got to have a long meeting with her and other colleagues this week and it was nothing but delightful. And we talked about many books, The Zookeeper's Wife being among them. So I read it this week. Which is a really roundabout way for me to talk about nice Nancy Pearl, the semi-celebrity who is unequivocally not a fuckface.

This Is It
I can't think about this title without going to the bad Kenny Loggins place. "THIS IS IT! Make no mistake where you ahhhh...."  So this documentary is just a bunch of clips of Michael Jackson rehearsing, and he is clearly only performing at about 25% effort, because it's just rehearsing. And yet, me, um, riveted. Must have been the dormant 6th grader in me who would pay money to watch Michael Jackson mow his lawn. Wait, I guess Michael Jackson wouldn't have mowed his lawn though. Well, I would have watched him make Bubbles mow it then, or something. Oh whatever.

Big Eden
Ok, so the ending was a little cheesy, but still. I thought it was sweet.