Tears of a Tori

There is all kinds of crap saved up on the Tivo since we have been gone for two weeks. Now is the time to catch up on things that will make my brain rot. Last night, I watched Tori and Dean: Home Sweet Hollywood. Ok, so I watched three episodes, if you must know. When someone watches tv in my house, the other person in the house has to be aware of it, even if they are doing something else, because our house just ain't that big. So Nordic Boy is half-watching this shite whether he likes it or not.

Here's how it went.

(Sad music, sad Dean face, tears from Tori)
Nordic Boy: What's wrong? Are they breaking up?
Me: No.
Him: Their kids ok?
Me: Yeah. Everything's fine.
Him: So what's the problem?
Me: See, Dean has motorcycles. Tori doesn't like his motorcycles. So Dean has to give up his motorcycles. He's really sad about it.
Him: Wow. I'm surprised he can function.

Later...
(Tense music, Tori in tears, Dean looks worried)
Nordic Boy: What's happening this time?
Me: Tori is throwing a party for her kid. The party planner and her friends messed up the ice sculptures, and now there is mud in her backyard.
Nordic Boy: And?
Me: That's all.
Nordic Boy: She's crying?
Me: Yes.
Nordic Boy: Oh.

Still later, and I turn around to see that Nordic Boy has put his book down and is full on watching. I don't say anything about this.
(Silent watching, silent watching, silent watching)
Nordic Boy: You know what I think their problem is?
Me: What?
Him: I just don't think they have the BALLS to be rich.
Me: Really?
Him: They just don't seem to be able to handle themselves. They just can't take it. It's too much pressure for them.
Me: You could do better, I suppose?
Him: Are you kidding? We would rock being rich!
(silence)
Him: Although a melted ice sculpture IS pretty sad.
Me: Tragic, really.
Him: Hand me the tissues.

Being sarcastic? About Tori and Dean? Do we have hearts of stone?